Post by AUBREE LYNN WATSON on May 18, 2011 17:43:24 GMT -5
aubree lynn watson
twenty-two. nemesis staff. talent scout. lucy hale.[/center]
[/size]"001 first day of writing in this stupid journal that my therapist said that i should do. she says it will help with how i deal with my past and my anger issues. please, like writing out what happens and how i feel everyday is going to help. but what is she is right and this really does help me. i can finally be a new person with a clean slate. who knows whats going to happen.
002 how could she die? she was my best friend, basically my only friend. how could she do this to me? she left alone, with no one, without her. i don't know if i can go through life without her, she was the only person i could go to. we knew each other since the first grade, and we moved out here together for our job openings. what am i going to do without her?
003 so it's been a month since my best friends death, and it's been awful, i cannot even concentrate on my work. my boss told me to take some time off a week ago. i'm still there, working, trying to deal with her death. i need to get my head on straight, i cannot be like this forever, i have to move on.
004 so i quit my job today. they are going to miss me. i was their best employee, and they fire me because i forgot an appointment. screw them to hell. but it's alright, that is the reason why i went on an interview three days ago. and they called me this morning saying that i could start for training monday morning. it is now thursday. wooo hooo i am excited.
005 i went to her grave today, it's been a year now and i am proud at how far i have come. i'm still dealing with her death, not completely over it yet, but i made it to where i can be happy and enjoy my life, while still thinking about her, my and a couple of my co-workers went out to eat for dinner. i love my job.
006 so i've been hanging out with friends lately, and they've introduced me to something amazing. i am going to start growing cannabis! and smoking it. it's just like it opens up your mind to that part of your imagination that you cannot reach while you are in a sober type of mind. it's been making me wanna try new things. pick up the guitar, maybe song-writing.
007 you know what, i cannot believe this is happening to me. i was such an idiot. how could i let myself be unprotected like that. now i have to deal with consequences which i am waiting for in about five minutes. please let it be negative. please. . . . . . and it's negative. -slaps-
008 you know, i love having boy toys, but after a while, they get pushy and jealous, you are my boy toy not my lover. i am really starting to hate every kind of a relationship. so i finally got that raise that i deserve, i have to push him into it, but that's me, stubborn as a mule. if i want something i will get it, or at least try to.
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aubree. seven years. nineteen. aim & msn, pm me for contacts.